My 14th year sales

Another theater season has come and gone, and I'm happy to say that this one truly was a banner one. But--and it's a big but--it had to be. Since I'm now a full-time playwright, and my playwriting income is only about a third of my old engineering income, I need to keep growing my royalties by a healthy percentage each year if I want to make a go of this.

The best way to do that, of course, is to get more productions. And the best way to do that is to write more plays. Which is why I've been working like crazy, cranking out plays quickly while maintaining the quality people have come to expect.

But not just any plays. It's also important to keep the market in mind and write what schools and community theaters are looking for. And a couple of results from the past year have me rethinking this whole thing.

More on that later. In the meantime, let's take a quick look at...

The numbers

A year ago, I saw a massive bump from the previous year. My production count was up 16% and my royalties were up--get ready for it--44%. Maybe I was a little delusional, but I was hoping for something similar this year. Unfortunately, I fell short. I had a total of 451 productions, which is up 8% over the previous year while my royalties were up only 6%.

It's not that my new plays didn't do well. They did. It's just that some of my big hits from the previous year dropped off a little more than expected.

Still, I'm not worried. I've seen quite a few of my plays pop up again in a year or two so I'm hopeful that will happen again over the next twelve months.

And besides, that 451 is an all-time record for me so I really can't complain.

The top five

1) The Enchanted Bookshop--118 productions

My most-popular play for the eighth year in a row was this magical comedy. That 118 is actually an amazing number because it represents the second highest production count this play has ever had.

The Enchanted Bookshop is truly the Energizer Bunny of plays. It just keeps going and going and going.

It's the only one of my plays that theaters repeat, sometimes as often as once a year. It's also the only one of my plays (besides The Enchanted Bookshop Musical) that regularly appears in professional theater seasons alongside such big-name works as Clue, Matilda, and Into the Woods.

2) It Happened on Route 66--48 productions

For the second year in the row, my second-most-popular play was this 1950's romantic comedy. And I couldn't be happier.

I love this play. I love the characters. I love the humor. I love the cool diner setting. And I'm grateful that so many people around the country seem to love the play as well.

I can't wait to see how well the brand new musical adaptation Route 66 does this year.

3) Bringing Down the House--36 productions

My third-most-popular play was this backstage comedy. What's especially impressive is that this was only a partial year for the play. It wasn't even released until August.

I've got be honest. This one surprised me. I never dreamed it would be this popular. I wrote it simply because a school commissioned me to write it. They wanted a play about a musical rehearsal that keeps getting interrupted so none of the characters actually get to sing. As a result, the play calls for a lot of different musical tracks which are only played for a few bars.

The play is pretty quirky in other ways as well. There's a swordfight between a group of confused protesters using the handles of their protest signs against a band of sledgehammer-armed demolition workers, There's another swordfight involving actual swords. And then there's a dance involving aliens, pirates, and several crates of dynamite.  

The reason I think it's so popular is just the sheer size of the play. It calls for a cast of 40, similar to my play It's a Madhouse!, which has also been wildly popular. So it's clear that a lot of schools are interested in plays that give a large number of students an opportunity to perform.

And this one definitely does. Unlike some plays that achieve their large cast sizes by plugging in a nameless chorus, my plays always give each character a name, a unique personality, a specific goal, and at least a couple of lines guaranteed to get a laugh. 

So one of the changes I'm planning to make in my career is to focus a lot more on huge-cast plays like this--even if they're not commissioned.

4) The Enchanted Bookshop Musical--27 productions

My fourth-most-popular play was this musical adaptation of The Enchanted Bookshop. This was another surprise because those 27 productions are the most it's received since its inaugural (and COVID-shortened) season of 2019-2020 and a big boost from last year's 15 productions. I don't know what happened to bring it back to life, but I like it.

5) You're Driving Me Crazy!--25 productions

My fifth-most-popular play was this collection of four driver's ed-related shorts. Ten years in, it's still getting a healthy number of productions.

Earlier this month, Pioneer released The Worst Fairy Tale Ever, my first one-act play since You're Driving Me Crazy! and I'm already hearing from teachers who tell me how excited their students are to perform it. So I think that's going to be a big play this year. And I'm going to watch it closely because I may start writing a lot more short plays.

Honorable mentions

I do want to give a shout-out to three plays that just missed being in the top five: Million Dollar Meatballs (also in its tenth year) and It's a Madhouse!, both of which snagged 24 productions, and How to Enchant a Bookshop, which was right behind them with 23 productions.

It's a Madhouse!, of course, has a one-act version titled simply Madhouse!, and if you combined the two of them, they would account for an impressive 47 productions. So even though the first of those two plays dropped off my top five this year, the pair remains a production powerhouse.

Finally, this was the first full year for How to Enchant a Bookshop and I find that particularly interesting because when I first submitted the play, there was some concern that it might cannibalize sales from the other Enchanted Bookshop plays. Seeing that two of them are still in my top five, it's heartening to know this didn't happen.

Final thoughts

So yeah, it was a good year. Sure, I wish some of my plays had done a little better and that my royalties had grown a little more. But still, it was a record-breaking year in many ways and I couldn't have done it without you, the drama teachers and theater directors who've chosen my plays over the years.

So let me just leave you with a large and very heartfelt...

Swiss Meatballs

No, that's not a typo. Sweden may be famous for their meatballs, but Switzerland has their own tasty version. And they now have another one to enjoy because Theaterverlag Kaliolabusto of Messen, Switzerland has just published a German language translation of my restaurant farce Million Dollar Meatballs.

This combination publisher/theater company did the same thing for How I Met Your Mummy six years ago. And it's all thanks to the relationship my own publisher Pioneer Drama Service has established with them. Kaliolabusto goes through Pioneer's catalog to decide which plays they want to translate and give the bulk of the performance fees to Pioneer to split with the playwright.

It's a real win-win-win. Kaliolabusto gets market-proven material to translate. Pioneer and the playwright gets increased exposure. And we all make a little money.

I feel honored by Kaliolabusto's selection of my play (it's one of only seven they've released this year). And I'm excited to see how popular this food-centered comedy will be in the land of fine chocolate and fondue.

By the way, that title translates to Meatballs and Diamonds. I may not be able to pronounce it, but I love the sound of it.

Guess I'd better dust off the four years of German I took in college--and never used since!

Instant Five-Timer

I've spoken before about my Five-Timers club, that elite group of schools and community theaters that have performed five or more of my plays. It usually takes a few years to achieve that lofty status. After all, producing groups generally like to mix things up by performing plays from a variety of playwrights.

So I have to give a big shoutout to Plain Dealing High School (Go Lions!) of Plain Dealing, LA, which became the fifth member of my Five-Timers Club--literally overnight--by booking five different plays of mine yesterday. 

The five plays are:

It Happened on Route 66 (my newest blockbuster)

Million Dollar Meatballs (a perennial favorite)

The Butler Did It! (an old classic)

You're Driving Me Crazy! (short and oh so sweet)

The Purrfect Crime (an overlooked charmer)

All five plays are scheduled for this school year, so I'm guessing they may be in-class readings rather than full productions. But they're all officially licensed and paid through Pioneer Drama Service so what the heck. I'll count them.

And no, my Five-Timers Club may not come with a jacket, like Saturday Night Live's version. But it does get you my everlasting gratitude and appreciation.

Thanks, PDHS! And break lots and lots of legs!

Free Read Friday

Subscribers to Pioneer Drama Service's newsletter are already familiar with Free Read Fridays. At the end of each week, Pioneer promotes one or more plays from their catalog by providing a link to a free downloadable copy of the complete script.

My plays have appeared on Free Read Friday several times in the past, sometimes on their own, sometimes as part of a themed collection (recent themes have included Children's Musicals and Christmas in July).

It's always exciting to see what plays they offer. But today I'm especially excited because for the first time, Pioneer is devoting the week's theme to a single author's works. And that author happens to be, well, me.

The five plays they selected are tied together in three key ways. They're all 60-80 minutes in length. They're all single-set. And they all feature my unique brand of humor (Pioneer's words, not mine😁).

The five are:

It Happened on Route 66

It's a Madhouse!

George Washington Ate My Homework

Million Dollar Meatballs

Whole Latte Love

Unfortunately, if you don't already subscribe to the newsletter, it's too late to download these. But I'd still urge to subscribe as soon as possible because the next four Free Read Fridays will also offer five (or more) free perusal scripts.

Pioneer calls it their Five-for-Five, and I think it's a fantastic deal. Where else can you get 25 perusal scripts--a $200 value--for free? The themes they'll be offering are Halloween shows, murder mysteries, fairy tale courtroom comedies, and contest pieces.

And yes, you can unsubscribe at any time. To add your name to the growing list of subscribers, just fill out their form here.

My 13th year sales

When I set out to write this post, I was going to use the word "gangbusters" to describe how this theater season went for me. But then I went back to look at what I wrote last year and realized I'd used that same word then.

So what word is stronger than gangbusters? Stellar? Dynamite? Fantabulous? Nifty?

Okay, so maybe my favorite thesaurus app throws in a few clunkers. The point is you can pick any one of those words and they wouldn't do justice to how successful this year was for me. Here are just three of the highlights.

I had a total of 420 productions, 16% more than my previous record of 362, set all the way back in that pre-COVID year of 2019. 

My royalties were an impressive 44% higher than my previous record, which was set just last year and which I'm definitely not going to share here (sorry!).

I also added three new amazing countries to my life list, making a grand total of 24 (still no South America though!).

The top five

The Enchanted Bookshop was my best-selling play for the seventh year in a row, with a whopping 109 productions. That's the most it's had since 2020 (actually, the 2019-2020 season, with the tail end of that season being clipped due to COVID-related theater closures). While most of my plays drop 50% or more within three years, this play has shown incredible staying power. In fact, its production count has dropped only 30% in five years and had held pretty steady the last two years. Besides that, the play got me my 22nd and 23rd countries this year with productions in Abuja, Nigeria and Jakarta, Indonesia. And did I mentioned it already has 43 productions booked for next year? Wowzuh!

It Happened on Route 66 was my second best-selling play with 57 productions, this being its first full year of relief. And that's a whole story in itself. For years after writing The Enchanted Bookshop, I've been trying to replicate its success, but my subsequent eight plays received only a small fraction of that play's productions. Then along came this love letter to the Mother Road, proving that a completely different story--if it's the right story--can get halfway there.

If the success of It Happened on Route 66 was a pleasant surprise, the numbers for It's a Madhouse! were an even bigger surprise. This crazy treasure hunt farce got an impressive 41 productions this year (again its first full year), making it my third-place play. But if you combine that number with the 33 productions received by Madhouse!--its one-act version and my fourth-place play--you get a total of 74 productions--almost Enchanted Bookshop levels. And the royalties for this one-two punch were 82% of the those that my top-earning play received.

Two new hit plays in one year? I'll take it.

With 24 productions, fifth place goes to my coffee shop comedy, Whole Latte Love. This was the play's first full-year as well, but it was down a bit from the 28 productions it got the year before, mostly because that year was practically a full year. It's too early to know for sure, but I expect that this love-filled play will continue to pull healthy numbers over the next few years.

But wait, there's more

Further down the list, I have to give a shout-out to my restaurant farce Million Dollar Meatballs, which has been going strong for nine years now. And by strong, I mean it has gotten 20 or more productions every year except for the two COVID-affected years. As Adam Sandler would say, not too shabby.

I was kind of blown away by this one, but An Enchanted Bookshop Christmas is defying the play-aging odds. This was its fourth year of publication and it somehow managed to earn more royalties this year than it did in any of its previous three years. Like 50% more. This has never happened to me before. A little elfin magic? I have to wonder...

Finally, I have to mention my collection of driver's ed skits, You're Driving Me Crazy!, which, like Million Dollar Meatballs, continues to receive 20 or more productions a year in this, its ninth year. Even more amazing, this year the play got me my 24th country, with a production in Rzeszow, Poland. 

The big question

I've been racking my head lately, trying to figure out why my last four plays have done so well. In last year's wrap-up, I suggested that it may be because I've been concentrating more on single-set, contemporary plays. I'm sure that's helped, but it doesn't explain why my cat inheritance comedy, The Purrfect Crime, has never done super well.

Then I realized that all four plays came after my two-year hiatus from writing plays to try to break into novels and screenplays. How did that go? Not well.

But maybe I learned something in those two years. I spent so much of that time studying the Hero's Journey and learning to apply those lessons to my novels and screenplays that my plays may have benefited as well. I feel like they're stronger now. Tighter. More character-driven.

I know they have a lot more heart.

Anyway, I want to thank all of the schools and theater companies who performed my plays this year. I love you all!

And if you enjoyed my current plays, just wait. There's more great stuff right around the corner. Stay tuned!

Chi-town Bookshop makes reading fun

 

When I lead workshops at schools or theater conferences, one of the most common questions I get is: Which of your plays is your favorite? I'm not the first writer to say that choosing a favorite play or novel or story is like choosing a favorite child. You just can't do it.

And that's what I tell them.

But they never let me off the hook, so I usually turn the answer around to something like: This is what I like about some of my plays.

I truly believe The Last Radio Show is my funniest play, especially with the way the skits-within-the-play capture the rapid-fire cadence of those old-time radio shows.

Million Dollar Meatballs is a perennial favorite of producing groups, remaining as popular today as it was when it was first published nine years ago, and has the best physical humor of any of my plays.

I'm really happy with how my latest play, It Happened on Route 66, turned out. While it has a similar humor to my other plays, this 1950's-set comedy adds layers of romance and nostalgia that seems to hit a sweet spot with audiences.

And of course I have a special fondness for The Enchanted Bookshop. Not just because it's my best-selling play, but because schools and community theaters have found a ton of creative ways to use their production to encourage kids to read.

Some theaters give a free book to each child in the audience. Others encourage kids to attend the play dressed as their favorite book character. Still others have characters from the plays read books to the kids, either before the show or in on online promo.

The Kirk Players of Mundelein, IL have found yet another way to make reading fun.

This long-running community theater (58 years and counting!) is performing the show April 5-7, and to encourage kids in their community to read, they're holding a drawing for two free tickets to the show. To enter the drawing, kids need to read one of the books referred to in The Enchanted Bookshop and comment on the theater company's Facebook page as to what they liked about the book.

That's a lot of books to choose from. For those keeping score at home, these are the books on that list:

The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

Heidi

Pollyanna

Oliver Twist

Treasure Island

Doctor Doolittle

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

Frankenstein

Hopalong Cassidy

White Fang

Moby Dick

Robinson Crusoe

Little Women

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes

Crime Never Pays

20,000 Years in Sing Sing

Mary Poppins

Don Quixote

Gone with the Wind

Not all of these books have characters in the play, of course. Some, like Moby Dick and Don Quixote, are only mentioned in passing (although the Don Quixote character does play a major role in my lighthearted prequel, How to Enchant a Bookshop).

Anyway, I love the idea of this drawing. I'm sure it'll motivate a lot of kids to read, although there's at least book on this list that I hope no kid picks up.

It could really be a slog.

British Columbia Meatballs gets funky

 

 

Schools and community theaters have made some very creative choices with my plays. But nobody has ever given one a disco spin.

Until now.

According to a local newspaper article, Footlighters Theatre Society in beautiful Creston, British Columbia is performing my restaurant farce Million Dollar Meatballs this June--and they're setting it in the 1970's disco era.

Does that mean a glittering disco ball hanging from the ceiling of Chez Monyeu? Bell bottoms on the bus boys? The sounds of ABBA playing between scenes? The article doesn't say. But it does make clear that director Jason Smith is a man of exquisite good taste.

"We looked at a lot of scripts before choosing this one," Smith said. "It's just so ridiculously funny and will be a lot fun for audiences of any age."

This is just their third show since reopening after the pandemic. And they have only one goal.

"We wanted this season's productions to make the audience laugh," Smith continues. "And Million Dollar Meatballs will definitely do just that." 

Sounds groovy to me!

Mini Meatballs

This week, we've been talking about some of the challenges keeping theater alive in these days of coronavirus.

I've been really impressed with the resourcefulness that actors and directors all over the world have shown. But perhaps no one has impressed me more than the teachers and students of Sherman High School in Sherman, NY. When their production of Million Dollar Meatballs was cancelled by the state's stay-at-home orders, they came up with a totally ingenious way to let the show go on.

A little thing called Lego.

Their handiwork can be seen in the video above. I don't know if it was inspired by The Lego Movie or one of my favorite shorts of all time, but it's a lot of fun. And I've got to say, that's one of the most detailed sets I've ever seen--of any size.

You may not want to take on such an intricate, manually demanding technique. But let their creativity be an inspiration for you.

In theater, there are no bounds to what you can do.

Fifth Time's the Charm

If Saturday Night Live can have a five-timers club, then maybe I should too.

I'm kidding, of course, but the thought recently crossed my mind because I got word that Johnston Heights Church in the Vancouver, BC suburb of Surrey has booked a fifth play of mine.

We've had a long, fruitful relationship going all the way back to 2014, when the church's drama group produced The Butler Did It! They found it the old-fashioned way, by searching the Pioneer Drama Service website. Their production was such a hit that after it was over, Carol A., who oversees the play selection there, asked me to recommend another play.

At the time, I was trying to get a second production of Kill the Critic! so I sent her that, not really believing that a church would be interested in my naughty farce. They weren't, but Carol did think it was hilarious.

So I sent her a play that Pioneer had just published, Million Dollar Meatballs. That one was perfect for them and became play number 2.

In 2017, Carol emailed me again, asking what else I could send her. I'd directed a wildly successful world premiere of The Last Radio Show the year before but was unable to get any publishers interested in it. Carol decided to take it on, and they gave it an equally successful second production. So successful, in fact, that she said the church was shaking from all of the laughter.

Last year, they went one step further. They presented the world premiere of Lights! Camera! Murder! (changing the name to Lights! Camera! Action! so it wouldn't raise eyebrows when seen on the church's marquee).

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to make it out there for the show, but they sent me a video of it so I could gauge the response and use that to punch up the script.

Which brings us to this year. On my suggestion, they decided to go back to my published plays and selected The Purrfect Crime.

More important than the plays, however, is the money that this vibrant, missions-oriented church has been able to raise through these productions. Every year, they choose one local charity to donate a large chunk of their proceeds to. One year it was a homeless shelter. Another year, it was a group supporting Syrian refugees.

So yeah, I'm thrilled that they like my plays. But I'm even more thrilled to know that they're using my plays to make life a little easier for people in need.

Keep up the great work, guys! Would you have any interest in a pirate play...?

Badger meatballs

It's been 31 years since I moved away from Wisconsin. But much of my family still lives there and I try to get back there at least once in a year.

It's the place where I was born. The place where I went to college. The place where I met my wife. It's also the place where I first fell in love with theatre.

So it means a lot to me when I see my plays being done there. That was the case this week when I came across this video of Million Dollar Meatballs from the Prairie Farm Playhouse in beautiful Prairie Farm, WI.

I like how they made the most of their limited space by splitting the set into two playing areas, one on the stage and one in front of the stage. And I love the spirited silverware duel toward the end of Act II.

Great job, gang. And go Badgers!

Bringing communities together

Leola Area Theatre of Leola, SD got a great writeup in the Aberdeen News for their production of How I Met Your Mummy. In the article, co-director Richard Jasmer talks about how they use the proceeds from the show to fund college scholarships for two local youth. They even announce the winners at the show.

But what really caught my eye was Jasmer's mention how they receive a lot of support from other communities in the area, with members of the amateur theaters in those communities going out of they way to see each other's shows.

"It's kind of neat to just go around and support each other," Jasmer says.

That's why I love community theater. It's not just a fun hobby for the actors. It's not just entertainment for the audiences. It's a way of bringing communities together.

And what could be better than that?

Hoosier meatballs

I'd like to give a big shout-out to Cloverdale Middle School of Cloverdale, IN, where Million Dollar Meatballs will be performed tomorrow night. The talented students there put together this video promoting the show, and I've got to say, I'm really loving it.

The bold graphics and retro music give it the feel of a 1960's mystery/comedy, like The Pink Panther. And check out the credit for the costume designers at the end ("the parents")!

Great job, everybody. And break legs!

Putting the community in community theatre

I just got back from a trip to Leoti, Kansas. Janelle Downs of the Wichita County Arts Alliance had invited me out to see their production of Million Dollar Meatballs (she was the director). And while I was there, she thought it would be a good idea if I spoke at the local high school.

I wasn't quite sure where Leoti was, but I jumped at the opportunity. I love visiting small towns--they remind me of my own hometown in Wisconsin-plus it would be the first time I had seen this particular play performed by adults. I was interested to see how it stood up.

To get to Leoti, as any resident will tell you, just head east from Colorado Springs, turn onto a couple of different highways, and when you come to the first flashing light--213 miles later--you're there.

As I headed out late Thursday night, however, I was doubting my sanity. They'd been predicting a winter storm all day, and I should have left earlier, but I stayed in town to catch a performance of Rumpelstiltskin, Private Eye--my first opportunity to see that show. 

The show ended around 8:30 PM and I immediately got on the road for the 3 1/2 hour drive. Fortunately, the winter storm held off until I left town so I managed to avoid most of the snow and only had to deal with rain and cold and wind for the rest of the trip. If I kept a good speed, I figured, I should be able to get there by midnight, leaving me plenty of time for sleep before getting up for a full day of teaching.

And then, just 12 miles west of Leoti, I saw the sign. Central Time Zone. I had lost an hour.

So around 1:30AM (the weather delayed me as well) I pulled up to the place where they arranged for me to stay for the three nights of my visit. When Janelle told me it was an apartment attached to a seed warehouse, I wasn't sure what to expect, but it turned out to be wonderful--clean, new and more spacious than a five-star suite.

I crawled into bed and caught what little sleep I could before the alarm went off four hours later. The day dawned gray and rainy, but I was raring to go. I jumped out of bed, showered and drove a couple of blocks to the high school.

Julie Conard, one of the school's English teachers, escorted me to her classroom, where I was to speak to the first class of the day. As it turned out, Julie was in the show too, playing the part of the obnoxious telegram deliverer Tammy Tonedeaf.

I knew ahead of time that the school didn't have any writing or drama classes or so I created a brand new presentation just for them. What I came up with was "A Playwright's Journey, or 48 Hours to Overnight Success". In it, I talk about my decades-long struggle to get published and the over 200 rejection I had received before I got there. I also offer some life lessons that I hope aren't too preachy, thinks like Practice, Practice, Practice and Don't Fear Rejection, Embrace It.

I ended up speaking to five different English classes, from 7th grade through juniors. The students seemed to enjoy my talk, although many were shocked when I told them it takes 10,000 hours to master any subject (thank you, Malcolm Gladwell!). I figure it took me at least that much time before I saw any success in writing. But then I'm a slow learner.

After lunch, Julie brought me into the auditorium to talk to the choir kids, who also happened to be the theatre kids. The school doesn't put on a show every year (it depends on class size, and in a small community like this, class size can vary 4X from one year to the next), but when they do, it's the choir kids who do it.

Many of the kids had heard my talk earlier in the day so I had to come up with something different--and quick. I grabbed my scripts of You're Driving Me Crazy!, threw some chairs on the stage for a car and, in a matter of minutes, we were doing cold readings of this driver's ed-themed play. The kids were great--so funny and talented--and after the impromptu performance I was gratified to hear one of the boys say he couldn't wait to get involved in the school's theatre program next year.

After school, I had a short break, then headed to the First Presbyterian Church for the final dress rehearsal of Million Dollar Meatballs. Normally, I don't offer feedback to the casts of my plays--I figure that's the director's job--but when Janelle herself asked me what I thought, I knew I had to share. And I told them the raw, unvarnished truth.  They did a fantastic job. Sure, there were a few places where they needed to pick up the pace and their delivery of some of the lines needed tweaking. But they were having a lot of fun with the play, and I knew the audience would too.

The next day was Saturday, and I spent most of the afternoon exploring Leoti. There wasn't a lot to see--even the residents will tell you that--I did get some nice pictures of downtown and the courthouse. Another highlight was a mural that the Arts Alliance had only recently put up. Between the sunflowers, the cows and the quilting patterns, it did a great job of capturing the down-home spirit of the town.

That night was the opening performance. The First Presbyterian Church had donated the use of their stage and the Arts Alliance squeezed in several large round tables for the audience. A long table was set up for the pre-show pot luck dinner, and soon it was filled with a wide and very tempting selection of casseroles and pasta dishes.

Of course, many of the cooks were inspired by the meatball theme of the play and brought their own version of those beefy orbs. There was a chipotle meatball dish that I found especially tasty.

The show didn't quite sell out, but it was close. We were sitting elbow to elbow as the house lights went down and the stage lights went up. The play started, and within minutes, the house was filled with laughter. I smiled. To me, it's the most beautiful sound of the world.

At intermission, there was a brief concert as some of the local children sang solos and duets to the accompaniment of a piano. As I sat there, soaking it all in, I was filled with a warm glow. This, I thought, is what community theatre is all about. Good food. A fun-loving cast. Hearty laughter. And the most talented kids in town.

Scratch that. This is what community is all about.

I heard somebody say they wish that more people had attended the show. I quickly did the math in my head. Leoti has a population of 2000 people. The church fit about 100 people, and with two performances, that meant 10% of the town's population would see the show,

I'd kill to get 10% of Colorado Springs' population to one of my shows.

The second act started and the laughter, if possible, was even louder and more enthusiastic. After the show, I talked with the audience, autographed a few programs and then said goodbye to my new friends, who already seemed like old friends.

I left the next morning. The rain had finally stopped, though the sky was still a somber gray. I glanced in my rear view mirror, and as I watched the houses and the grain elevator growing smaller, I said one final goodbye.

You know, it's funny. A couple of months ago I had never heard of Leoti, Kansas.

Now I'll never forget it.

Meatballs in the Middle East

Million Dollar Meatballs is circling the globe. After a run in Taiwan in February, my restaurant farce landed at the American International School in Abu Dhabi last month.

Great costumes, guys! And I love the foodie posters on the walls.

Meatballs in Taiwan

Check out this poster for the Taiwanese premiere of Million Dollar Meatball, coming February 25-26 to a middle school in Taichung. I love how they made it look just like a movie poster, right down to the iconic font used for the credits at the bottom.

But my favorite part has to be the goofy expressions of the actors. They give the production a real sense of fun.

And in case you were wondering how to write Million Dollar Meatballs in Mandarin, it's like this:

百萬美元肉丸子.

Break legs, everyone!

Hawkeye meatballs

And if, after watching that clip of Million Dollar Meatballs, you want to see the whole play, you can--thanks to the Wolf Creek Players of Dysart, IA. Their production was a hoot, with some clever ad libs (their actors broke into laughter more than once), and they even figured how to stage the "swordfight" at the climax of the play with a larger-than-life knife and fork (check it out starting at the 1:04:57 mark).

Nice work, everyone!

Why high school theatre survives

It's a sad fact that all across this country, high schools are cutting their theatre programs, especially if that school is in a small community. Especially if that community isn't all that prosperous to begin with.

However, it's also true that a lot of these schools are keeping their theatre programs alive, and often that's purely due to the passion and dedication of the teachers and students.

That's what happened at Fort Lupton High School, which I visited last Friday so I could see their production of my play Million Dollar Meatballs. A year ago, this school--the only high school in a small agricultural community northeast of Denver--dropped all of its theatre classes due to budget constraints.

But Connie Garcia, the school's Spanish/ESL teacher (lower left in the photo), refused to let the program die. There were too many students who loved theatre, too many students for whom performing was their only creative outlet.

So she recruited some other teachers and former students to help out and, like Mickey and Judy before them, they put on a show. They did it on a shoestring, often making dozens of calls to find someone who could donate a single prop like the old stovefront used in the play.

Their commitment paid off. The performance I saw was very well-done, and the audience ate it up, laughing hysterically in all the right places (and some that weren't right!).

A bonus--for both the students and myself--was a Q&A session Ms. Garcia arranged earlier in the day. We assembled in the school auditorium and then, for an hour, I fielded questions from about 25 students, This included the entire cast and crew of the play as well as a handful of students from the school's creative writing class.

Like the kids, the questions were smart and funny. They were also surprisingly wide-ranging. Here are my favorites:

Q. What made you start writing?
A. I've always had so many stories in my head I needed to get them down on paper or it would explode.

Q. Which of my plays would I most like to see as a movie?
A. Million Dollar Meatballs. It's the most visual.

Q. What should I do if I find myself stuck in my own writing?
A. Make sure you know what your story is really about. Writing a one- or two-sentence synopsis can help with this. Also, try writing with a partner, which can get you out of a rut and take your thinking in new directions.

Q. Where do you get your ideas?
A. I usually start with a familiar setting, like a restaurant or museum, than try to twist it in some funny way.

Q. What's your zodiac sign?
A. Aries.

All in all, it was a wonderful experience and I want to thank Ms. Garcia and the entire staff at Fort Lupton High School for giving me this opportunity.

With dedicated teachers like these, high school theatre won't just survive. It'll thrive.

Stealing from the best

I don't know why I didn't see this before, but this clip of Million Dollar Meatballs has been posted on YouTube since last October. In fact, the clip is from the world premiere, which was produced by Discovery Canyon Campus in Colorado Springs, CO.

As described earlier on this blog, the cast was phenomenal. They improvised readily, and a lot of their bits ended up in the final, published version of the script.

One prominent example can be seen in this clip. Starting around the 1:00 mark is a scene between Cecil Blueblood, the arrogant restaurant critic (played by Josh Owen), and Humphrey, the snarky maitre d' (played by Grant Lattanzi).

As you'll see, Grant drew out much of the scene, giving the character a languid air that was not at all what I had in mind when I wrote the scene (I usually prefer more rapid-fire dialogue) but works really well here.

Humphrey tries to get Mr. Blueblood's name, which the critic wants to keep a secret.

HUMPHREY: And what is your name, sir?

CECIL: Uh, just put me down as Mr. X,

HUMPHREY: Very good, sir. And how do you spell that?

CECIL: M-i-s--

HUMPHREY: No, no. I mean the X part.

CECIL: Just draw two lines that cross in the middle.

In my original script, the gag ends there. Humphrey writes an X in his reservation book and the scene continues.

But Grant and Josh came up with a really clever bit. Humphrey draws a huge plus sign on his ledger and holds it up for Cecil--and the audience--to see. Cecil then tips the ledger in Humphrey's hand, turning the scribble from a plus sign to an X.

Man, why didn't I think of that?

A contrary example is shown later in the clip, starting around the 10:00 mark. Frazzled restaurant owner Sue DeJour (Ashley Miller) is looking for smart alecky dishwasher Olive Pitt (Tayler Scriber) and when she asks Humphrey, "Where's Olive?", he responds with a wry, "I imagine she's in a martini."

It's a funny line, and during the show, it usually got a good laugh. But I didn't include it in the final script.

Why? Because of pacing. The momentum in this scene comes from Sue's search for the elusive Olive, not the dialogue, and I thought it was more important to maintain that momentum than to squeeze in one more laugh.

How does that saying go? If you're going to steal, steal from the best? Well, these students were some of the best I'd ever worked with, so I had no qualms using their ideas in the script.

After all, in the theatre at least, there's another word for "stealing". It's "collaborating".

Wanted: Meatballs

Leave it to those creative teachers and students at Fort Lupton High School in Colorado to come up with a new twist on their poster for Million Dollar Meatballs. They used a very eye-catching design, and played up the criminal aspect of the villains by making the whole thing look like one of those old-time wanted posters. What a fun way to promote the show!

This production happens to be just an hour and a half up the road for me, so you can bet I'll be showing up one of those nights. Break legs, everybody!

Meatballs are ready!

I just received my copies of the script for Million Dollar Meatballs. Pioneer Drama Service always does a good job with their artwork, but I especially love what they came up with here. You've got to wonder how those thieves intend to use those cooking utensils in their getaway.

The script has only been available since August, but it's already gotten a great response, with productions booked for this fall in Lanesville, IN, Fort Lupton, CO and Dysart, IA (and those are just the ones that popped up on my Google alerts). Break legs, everybody!