30 Minutes Till Boarding to be published!

It's been a very long road--or should I say runway?--but my airport comedy is finally ready for the big time. Thirty Minutes Till Boarding has just been accepted for publication by Pioneer Drama Service. This is my 32nd play with them, and 36th play overall. And am I relieved!

The commish

I've been working on Thirty Minutes Till Boarding since April 2025, when Belmont Day School commissioned me to write another large cast play for them, my third in five years. The play finally premiered to great acclaim in March of this year. And you might think that would be it. Send it to Pioneer, wait for the inevitable acceptance of such a brilliant work, and move on to the next play.

Except it wasn't that simple. Pioneer liked it, but not enough to actually send me a contract. They wanted changes.

I was cool with that. I mean, I've revised my plays for them before, and the plays always come out stronger as a result: tighter, more organic, easier to produce. But this time they wanted a LOT of changes.

Since the play was written on commission, it was tailored to the requirements of the school. And Pioneer felt some of those requirements wouldn't carry over to other schools and community theaters. 

So I fired up my laptop and got to work.

Trimming the fat

The first thing that had to change was the size. This monster of a play was 104 pages long with a cast of 40. It was fairly easy to cut out 4 of the characters as they were in standalone stories and didn't really interact with the characters in the play (although I greatly miss the humor in those scenes). That. and some judicious trimming of the dialog throughout, got the script down to 88 pages and a cast of 36.

I also added a production note that explained how directors could cut additional characters to get the cast size down to 32, 30, or even 26.

Pioneer was concerned about the location. The play was originally set at Boston Logan International Airport, a nod to the school that commissioned it, and that turned out to be an auspicious choice because the airport's quirky nighttime closing policy inspired one of the key plot points in my play.

The problem is that Boston Logan is still remembered by many people as being the originating airport for the two planes that flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11. Wishing to avoid that association, we decided to change the location to a very generic-sounding New England International Airport (a suggestion of my editor Brian).

Tying it all together

The biggest change--and the one that took the most time--revolved around the characters of Egbert and Henrietta. I included them because my intent with the play was to show a cross-section of humanity, and what could be more human than an elderly couple who is traveling to see their brand new grandbaby and can't stop showing pictures of her to everyone they meet?

Egbert is also quite a talker, and in the original version of the play, he dishes out words of advice that happen to solve some pretty big problems for the characters he talks to.

Well, Pioneer wanted more of that, and I agreed. So I came up with ways for Egbert to solve EVERYONE's problems,. The trick was doing so without making it seem forced or overly sentimental.

I think I did it. As a result, Egbert has become the connective tissue of the play in that he ties all of the individual stories together. But he has also become the heart, dispensing wisdom without really realizing it and making the world a better place along the way.

Oh, one more thing. Pioneer wanted to change the title from Thirty Minutes Till Boarding to 30 Minutes Till Boarding so it would show up higher in search results. Eight keystrokes later, the change was made. If only all changes were that easy!

Fortunately, Pioneer loved my changes and agreed to publish the play just in time for the new school year.

An adorable child

This is the place in the post where I usually give you a taste of the play by sharing one of my favorite scenes. Of course, I already shared a scene in an earlier post, but that was one of the ones ended up on the cutting room floor. So instead, let me leave you with a scene which is absolutely, positively guaranteed to show up in the published script. In it, Egbert and Henrietta are assisted by the two very different gate agents, Marsha and Kylie.

MARSHA: May I help you, sir?

EGBERT: (Reads her nametag.) Oh. I see your name is Marsha—

MARSHA: Yes, it is—

EGBERT: We have a daughter named Marsha. Just had our first grandbaby, she and her husband Dave. That's why we're traveling, you know. To see her.

MARSHA: (Unenthusiastic.) Well, isn't that wonderful?

EGBERT: Would you like to see a picture of her?

MARSHA: Um—

KYLIE: Of course, we would! (MARSHA rolls her eyes at KYLIE. EGBERT pulls out his wallet. The accordion-style photo holder inside falls open.) Wow. That's a lot of pictures.

EGBERT: You can never have enough pictures when you've got the cutest grandbaby in the world!

HENRIETTA: Oh, Egbert! Stop bragging!

EGBERT: That's not bragging! It's a documented fact!

MARSHA: She's an adorable child, sir. Now how can we help you? 

EGBERT: What? Oh, yes. I was hoping we could get our seat assignments.

MARSHA: Of course, you can, sir. May I see your boarding passes?

EGBERT: (Digs in his pockets.) Boarding passes. Boarding passes. Now what did I do with those?

KYLIE: They're right here, sir. (Grabs the boarding passes and holds them up.)

EGBERT: Well, would you look at that! I plumb forgot I set them down!

(DR. DIAZ forms a line behind EGBERT. GERALDINE, PAUL, and BELINDA quickly join her.)

KYLIE: (Looks at the boarding pass.) Oh, look, sir. You already have your seats assigned. See? You're in 21E and your lovely wife is in 21F.

EGBERT: Huh. I wonder when we did that.

MARSHA: You must have done it at the ticket counter.

KYLIE: Or maybe you did it at home?

EGBERT: Now how could we have done that?

KYLIE: Oh, it's really very simple, sir. Just go to our website or download our app—

EGBERT: Nope. No way. We don't do any of that fancy internet stuff.

KYLIE: Okay...

EGBERT: It's like our daughter always says. She says, "Dad, you really need to get a cell phone." Well, I've gotten along fine without one for seventy-two years. Why would I need one now?

KYLIE: It looks like you're all set for your flight, sir. (Hands the boarding passes back to EGBERT.)

EGBERT: And besides, you can't make a real connection with someone over the phone. You've got to talk to them face-to-face!

MARSHA: Excuse me, sir, but there are people waiting behind you.

EGBERT: Huh? (Turns and sees THERAPY GROUP.) Ah. So there is. So there is.

HENRIETTA: Come along, Egbert. Why don't you find us a place to sit?

EGBERT: I think I'll find us a place to sit.

KYLIE: You have yourself a sunshiny day, do you hear?

MARSHA: Please. Don't encourage him.

I think this one is going to be a big hit. It's got humor. It's got heart. And it's got Egbert. What else do you need?

South Dakota Route 66 celebrates America's birthday

Route 66 may not have gone through South Dakota. But it definitely leads to the heart of one Coyote State theater.

For 34 years now, Area Community Theatre has entertained the citizens of Mitchell, South Dakota (home of the world famous Corn Palace!). They do five adult shows a year plus one youth show in the summer.

This year, with the 250th birthday of America just around the corner, they wanted the youth show to celebrate our country. And what could be more American than It Happened on Route 66, a play set along that famous ribbon of asphalt known as America's Highway?

According to this news article on the Mitchell Now website, the cast and crew are having a blast.

"Everybody is really enjoying it, and getting into their characters," says office manager Jesse Stroud. "And having the hands-on piece, too, of the set building and picking out some of the props and doing those things is giving them a lot of ownership in the process."

Sounds like a fantastic experience. But that's not all. In a first for the theater, they've arranged for a fun, 20-minute history lesson on Route 66 to be presented before the show by Dakota Wesleyan University in partnership with LifeQuest, a non-profit organization dedicated to supporting persons with developmental challenges.

The good folks at Area Community Theatre may not realize it, but there's another reason why It Happened on Route 66 was an especially apt choice. This November 11 marks exactly one hundred years since the highway was commissioned by the Federal Government.

Happy birthday, America! And happy birthday, Route 66! 

On weddings and rollercoasters

I don't usually talk about my personal life on these pages. But then I don't usually have a weekend like the one that just ended.

It all started on Friday with the wedding of our daughter Brooke to the love of her life, a wonderful young man named Ryan Winter (Brooke Winter has a nice ring to it, don't you think?). It was a gorgeous outdoor wedding in the Rim Country of Arizona, where the desert suddenly gives way to Ponderosa-covered mountains, and the weather was pretty much ideal: warm but not too warm, with an endless blue sky and not a drop of humidity in the air.

The wedding took place at Cabins on Strawberry Hill, a rustic resort with fourteen small but very cozy cabins, a wood-paneled reception hall, a large firepit, and an outdoor area with a mountain backdrop for the ceremony itself.

The wedding was officiated by a guy who works with Ryan (they're both civil engineers working on mostly highway-related projects; Brooke is an account manager at a marketing firm). Derek had gotten ordained so he could officiate another friend's wedding, but that one fell through so Brooke and Ryan are actually the first couple he ever married.

The setting for the ceremony was glorious, the bride was beautiful (of course!), and the vows were heartfelt and humorous (especially the bit about Ryan promising not to get mad when Brooke's Diamondbacks beats his beloved Padres).

Derek brought the funny as well. We all knew that Brooke and Ryan met on the dating app Hinge and that they'd bonded over a shared love of hiking, beer, and dogs. What we didn't know, at least until it was revealed by Derek, was that Ryan borrowed his roommate's dog for his profile picture because he didn't actually have one of his own.

The next hour was spent taking pictures, then we all proceeded to the reception, where a taco truck served a delicious, if messy, reception dinner, while the specialty cocktails included a Spicy Mika-Rita (named after Brooke's sassy rat terrier mix) that was a big hit. Afterwards, the DJ kept the energy level high and the crowd dancing with an eclectic mix of yacht rock (blame Brooke), alt rock, and hip hop. Everyone had a fantastic time.

The bets part: my 83-year-old widowed mother-in-law caught the bouquet.

At the same time, Tammy and I were dealing with a dying dog. After our 12-year-old lab mix Honey lost interest in food at the beginning of May, we spent the rest of the month shuttling her from vet clinic to vet clinic, trying to figure out what was causing it and what could we do about it.

The answers turned out to be: 1) a 5cm squamous cell carcinoma mass in her soft palate and throat, and 2) nothing. Chemotherapy is ineffective with this type of cancer, and while radiation would kill the tumor, it would leave a gaping hole in the roof of her mouth which would still make it difficult to eat.

We knew she would need to be put down eventually, but we didn't want to rush it just before the wedding. We were hoping to give her a few special days before she passed. So we rented an Airbnb (dogs weren't allowed to stay at the cabins) and brought her with us.

She loved it there. She was so excited to sniff the long grass around the house we'd rented, just as she used to do before she fell ill. And on Saturday, when we took her for a brief visit to the cabins, she reveled in all the attention she got from the wedding guests.

It may have been her last happy day.

Brooke and Ryan are now in Cabo San Lucas and we're back at home, making preparations for Honey's farewell. And as I look back at the weekend, I'm struck by what a rollercoaster ride of emotions it was. We're thrilled for Brooke and Ryan, that their wedding was everything they dreamed it would be and that their future is so blindingly bright.

But we're finding it difficult to separate that from the grief we feel knowing that Honey will soon no longer be with us. She's always been such a sweet, kindhearted dog, and we're going to miss her terribly.

The greatest of joys to the deepest of sorrows, all in one weekend. It's almost too much to bear. But I suppose that's life.